IELTS Free Online Writing Practice - Is individualism more valued than collectivism in modern society?

IELTS.WORK Free Online Writing Practice # 1712436260

Topic: "Is individualism more valued than collectivism in modern society?"


Model Answer:
In today's world, both individualism and collectivism coexist, but it is evident that individualism has taken precedence over collectivism in many aspects of modern society. Individualism emphasizes personal freedom, self-reliance, and the pursuit of one's goals and aspirations, while collectivism promotes the importance of group harmony, cooperation, and shared responsibilities.

In recent times, individualism has gained significant traction due to factors such as globalization, technological advancements, and an increasing emphasis on personal achievement. People are encouraged to carve out their unique identities and cultivate their skills in order to succeed in a competitive world. For example, the rise of social media platforms has allowed individuals to showcase their talents and share their stories with a broader audience, thereby reinforcing the value of individualism.

On the other hand, collectivist societies emphasize group harmony and interdependence rather than personal independence. While these societies have their own merits, such as strong social cohesion and a sense of community, they may not always accommodate the diverse needs and aspirations of individuals. In some cases, this can lead to stifled creativity and limited opportunities for self-expression.

It is essential to recognize that both individualism and collectivism have their place in modern society. While individualism provides a platform for personal growth and development, collectivism ensures social stability and cohesion. However, the current trend towards prioritizing individualism over collectivism can be seen as a reflection of the broader shifts in societal values and priorities that emphasize self-expression, creativity, and competition.

In conclusion, it is clear that individualism has become more valued than collectivism in many aspects of modern society. This shift can be attributed to factors such as globalization, technological advancements, and an increasing focus on personal achievement. While both individualism and collectivism have their merits, the current trend towards prioritizing individualism is a reflection of contemporary values and priorities that emphasize self-expression, creativity, and competition.

Score:
- Task Response: 9 (The candidate has addressed all parts of the question and provided a thorough response.)
- Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5 (The candidate's writing is generally coherent and well-structured, with some minor errors in cohesion and coherence.)
- Lexical Resource: 9 (The candidate demonstrates an extensive vocabulary range and accuracy, using a variety of complex sentences and phrases appropriately.)
- Grammar Range and Accuracy: 8.5 (The candidate's grammar is mostly accurate, but there are a few errors that slightly affect the overall clarity of the text.)

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