IELTS Free Online Writing Practice - Type Argumentative

IELTS.WORK Free Online Writing Practice # 1711618064

Task Type: Writing Task 2 - Argumentative Essay


Question: Should governments prioritize mental health services?

In recent years, there has been an increasing focus on the importance of mental health and well-being. Some argue that governments should prioritize mental health services to address the growing need for support in this area. Others believe that mental health is not as important as other pressing issues such as poverty, education, and public safety. In this essay, we will examine both sides of the argument and determine whether or not governments should prioritize mental health services.

Model Answer:

In recent years, there has been an increasing focus on the importance of mental health and well-being. Some argue that governments should prioritize mental health services to address the growing need for support in this area. Others believe that mental health is not as important as other pressing issues such as poverty, education, and public safety. In this essay, we will examine both sides of the argument and determine whether or not governments should prioritize mental health services.

On one hand, it can be argued that mental health services should indeed be a top priority for governments. Firstly, mental health is an essential aspect of overall health and well-being. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), mental health is "a state of well-being in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community." This implies that without proper mental health support, individuals may not be able to function optimally in their personal lives, at work, or within their communities.

Secondly, there is a significant global burden of mental disorders. The WHO estimates that more than 300 million people suffer from depression, which is the leading cause of disability worldwide. Additionally, suicide is the second leading cause of death among young people aged 15-29 years. Providing adequate mental health services can help alleviate this burden and save lives.

On the other hand, there are those who argue that governments should not prioritize mental health services over other essential issues such as poverty, education, and public safety. They contend that these areas are more critical in terms of overall social welfare and development. For instance, addressing poverty can improve living conditions and access to basic needs, which in turn may have a positive impact on mental health.

Moreover, some argue that investing in education is the key to long-term improvement in mental health outcomes. By providing individuals with knowledge and skills, they are better equipped to manage stress and adversity in their lives, reducing the need for specialized mental health services.

In conclusion, while mental health services are undoubtedly essential, it can be argued that governments should not prioritize them above other pressing issues such as poverty, education, and public safety. Instead, a balanced approach should be taken, where all these areas receive adequate attention and resources. This comprehensive strategy would ultimately contribute to the well-being of individuals, families, and communities as a whole.

Score:
- Task Response: 9 (The essay addresses the question prompt in an appropriate manner and provides relevant information.)
- Coherence and Cohesion: 9 (The essay is logically structured, with clear connections between ideas and smooth transitions.)
- Lexical Resource: 8.5 (The vocabulary used in the essay is mostly suitable for the task and demonstrates a good range of lexical resources.)
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 9 (The grammar in the essay is accurate, and the sentence structure varies appropriately.)
- Presentation of Ideas: 8.5 (The essay presents ideas in a clear and concise manner, with appropriate examples.)

Total Score: 35/40

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